A Beloved Drunk Uncle

After feeling varying degrees of sadness and angst over being "church homeless", this article renews my faith in what God continues to do each day.

Oh that Believing people might love their communities, their unchurched friends, and even their dysfunctional church like that "beloved drunk uncle"!

Suburban Haiku

My mortgage is large
Debt looms over me like fog
American Dream?

A Response To Derek

A response to Derek

I received a thoughtful response to two posts, here and here, from Derek, who is obviously a kind, handsome, thrifty, brave, and courteous Christian fellow. Oh, and one who takes well to compliments.

Derek had a couple of thoughts that I wanted to respond to here, as they are important ideas that beg further discussion. Derek was concerned about setting a "low bar" to membership in a church. Lowering the bar seemed to be troublesome to Derek, in that some compromising (watering down) of the Gospel may be taking place if a church is too easy on letting in new members. This is a good point. Derek noted that some of the "wild questions" from potential new members about the responsibilities of membership in a church would avoided if we were more strict in our delineation of what membership is all about.

In my mind, the height or depth of the bar to church membership, wild questions, and the general spiritual depth of congregants are all related to three primary things - the Word proclaimed, the Word received, and Christian Community. If we assume together that the Word is being faithfully proclaimed, then we have the issue of whether people hear it with open hearts and minds, and then whether they are acting on the direction of Scripture to lead lives that reflect genuine Christian Community.

My thinking is that one of the big reasons that the Word (once faithfully proclaimed) is not received well, or is received not in the proper context is that we church folk are pretty lousy at practicing Christian Community. Ok, let me rephrase that, we stink (often times) at understanding what Christian community really means. For further very good reading on this subject, please see this book. We can live transformed lives, we can model communities, families, friendships, and fellowships that reflect the grace of Jesus. It is very hard work, but my experience has been this is the single most important thing that leads people into relationship with Christ, not setting the bar high to membership in a religious institution. My life in Christ was brought about by seeing Christian community practiced in a college dorm at UCLA - if you can imagine that.

Derek also made a very good point, and points to something that the modern church is very poor at conveying, the concept of Christ as LORD, as opposed to Christ as Savior. Again, does this not go to the issues of Christian community? Are our lives really transformed, and do we this out in a way that is attractive to others - magnetic, appealing, life-giving and affirming?

I am concerned about the use language such as "ungodly neighbors", or the "remnant" (pertaining to the small band of faithful believers). My neighbors may indeed be ungodly, but I will choose, to my last breath, to persistently express to them, in ways that they might be able to hear, the great and immeasurable love of Christ. I will not dismiss them as ungodly, for the Hound of Heaven pursues us all, to the end. We are all, to the last person, loved greatly. And a remnant we may be, but I think we might want to be a remnant possessed of the need to share our faith to a world dying around us. Not just a defiant and self-satisfied remnant.

Derek, I hope that I have responded with a kind heart, heard your concerns, and in some small way brought understanding and hope. Hope for the church.

P.S. Derek, do you have a blog??

Our Lives of Quiet Desperation

Henry David Thoreau

Henry David Thoreau once penned:

"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation"

This was written as Thoreau spent two years and two months on Walden Pond, in Concord, Massachusetts, pondering the life of being removed from civilization. There is wisdom in taking this time of separation to consider one' place in life, and the ways in which live moves around us and affects us.

Sitting by a Pond
I identify with the idea of separation in some ways, and the words of Thoreau, in that I have been on a journey of sorts for some time now, as we left our church home of many years, and are, in some ways but not all, "church homeless".

My wife and I have sought the counsel of a wise pastor, who understands well the struggles we have been facing. His encouragement has been very helpful. We have decided together that this is both a time of mourning for what we have lost and a time of discovery, to see what God will provide in the future. How thankful we are to have both wise counsel and a God that leads and cares for us.

"Doublethinkers"
I came across a second thought about this concept in an editorial in Christianity Today, that contains this quote:

"Natan Sharansky, in his The Case for Democracy, argues that societies are based on either fear or freedom. A free society allows for public protest without fear of punishment. Fear societies do not. As a result, fear societies subdivide three ways: there is a small minority of true believers in the totalitarian regime, another small minority of dissidents, and a vast middle of "doublethinkers." Doublethinkers publicly toe the repressive party line but inwardly yearn for freedom."

Doublethinkers. Interesting. I wonder if, in fact, we might have a form of quiet fear going on in all our own lives to some extent. Would the quote above not also be true for the spiritual state of us, and many of those around us. And what is the "regime" we face? Is it not a regime of consumerism, success defining our character, status in society? And what does "yearning for freedom" mean? Could it be a freedom of the heart, as described here?

Only relationship with Christ will make us truly free. But freedom is a subtle thing, there are varying degrees of freedom. Only the constant healing grace of the Savior can save us from "lives of quiet desperation" and transform us into free people.

Overcoming Obstacles

Go Rachel, Go!

Feel like your life has too many challenges? Too many bills to pay, kids too noisy, feeling lonely, like your job stinks. Feel overwhelmed? Wonder if life has no meaning?

Try this. Try being born with a severe visual birth defect. Try coping with life that way.

Then try taking on a 1,131 mile dog sled race. You have to go see this, it is amazing. Awesome. I am going to be watching after Rachel. I sent this link to my daughters, and told them....you can do anything, if you set your mind to it.

And, while you are looking it over...think about this.

Is It Just About Showing Up?

I had another conversation today with a (different than the other day) pastor friend. He was telling me about his new members class at his church, and how they work to "set the bar rather low" to allow people the room to find their place in the church. He has been teaching this class for a number of years, and has had all sorts of wild questions from all points on the spiritual spectrum. This makes me glad, as this church does not just attract dull religious types, that I alluded to yesterday.

One of his favorite questions came recently, when a prospective new member shot up her hand and said, "Can I ask a question here.....ok, so how many Sundays a month are you guys expecting me to be here?" What an interesting question.

So, is this what some people think the church expects, that we just "show up"? That there is some sort of "attendance protor lurking in the balcony"? Remember it was Woody Allen that said that "Eighty percent of success is showing up." Oh please!

What if we churchie folk, those who care dearly for the Body of Christ, devoted our passions to building a church like this? A place where people would never need to ask a question like this. Ever. A place where the sense of community, grace, learning, laughter, and care for the real needs and hurts of life were so well met that - folks would never need to ask this question. They would just always show up. Always feel the need to go. Be attracted. Have to go!

Wait, I know of a para-church place that does this, for youth.

But What do the THE REST of The People Want?

Are The Cleavers "Seekers" or Just "Emergent"?


Gosh, come on and smile you people, or is church THAT bad?

Ok, so Tod Bolsinger has summarized for us what people want from the perfect church. I love the ideas people mentioned and those things not mentioned. What a nice gaggle of Christian folk. However, this whole topic has me wondering, what about people that don't usually, or do seldom, or won't ever -- go to church. What do THEY want? This question lead me here, where there are some rather scary thoughts on "unchurched" folk.

Try on for size:

• There has been a 92% increase in the number of unchurched Americans in the
  last thirteen years. In 1991 there were 39 million unchurched Americans compared with 75 million currently. (2004) 92%!!
  
• Men are one-third more likely than women to be unchurched (38% of men and 28% of women are unchurched). (2000)
• More than half (54%) of unchurched adults consider themselves to be Christian. (2004)

So, what should us church folk DO about this? Pretend like these people don't exist? Work hard to understand what their needs are, and why church is completely irrelevant to them? Care for them, start conversations with them about what they really want from life? Is their indifference about church our problem, do we "own" this one?

Or do we attribute their lack of attendance or interest in church to, well, their sinfulness? Their laziness? I mean heck, they can't get out of bed for a couple hours on Sunday? What is wrong with these people? Why would they want to go hear a potentially irrelevant sermon delivered in a place that looks like 1970 occurred yesterday and mingle with a group of indifferent Christian folk who like like they would also rather be at home, in bed, reading the Sunday paper?

"Its Over"

I had lunch yesterday with a pastor friend. He has always been known as a bit of a nonconformist, not really fitting in well with the crowd. He said to me, over sandwiches, "you know, the church as we know it, is a dying breed. Its over."

The more I have thought about this, the more encouraged I become. Perhaps God is doing a new thing? And perhaps those of us who Believe will be called to something really new, and different, much more like the First Century Church, or Revelations calls us to be. Who knows?

Thoughts, comments, questions?

White Guy Nearly Crashes Volvo Listening to NPR

Daniel Schorr

So I am driving home today from work, listening to NPR. There is lengthy coverage of the news that freedom seems to be breaking out in several places in the Middle East. Amazing. Its beginning to feel like 1989 in Eastern Europe. I am smiling, thinking, maybe God is at work in all this. Maybe, all this Iraq mess has some unexpected dividends. I wonder what Rob Asghar is thinking?

Then its time for news analysis with Daniel Schorr. I sink lower in my car seat, anticipating the typical smug discouragement I have come to know. Now mind you, in my recollection Mr. Schorr hasn't said anything favorable about a Republican administration since Ike. I am thinking, "here it comes", some form of indirect tribute to Madeleine Albright's brilliant foreign policy is the reason for recent developments in the Middle East. But instead, to my shock, I hear THIS (you have to listen to it, especially the ending).

I wanted to shout! "George Bush may be RIGHT." Right? Daniel Schorr on George W. Bush? I nearly piled my car, and could not stop grinning all the way home.

A Different Kind of Worship

As noted here my way cool wife just returned from a weekend of home building in Tijuana. Upon return, the team of those who went were trading emails about their experience. This email, from Jason Blandford, a Fuller Seminary student, has something very good to say:

"You know, our church has four different "styles" of worship, which are all different versions of the same thing. But the idea of going to Mexico and building a house seems to me like an act of worship--we are offering our bodies as living sacrifices, a spiritual act of worship (Romans 12), and we labored and worked honestly with our own hands, so as to have something to share with the needy (Ephesians 4), we rendered service with enthusiasm, as to the Lord and not to men (Ephesians 5), we did it for the "least" of God's people (if there is a "least") and we did it for the King (Matthew 25). People at our church have asked me what is my favorite style of worship...from now on I will tell them the truth--my favorite way to worship the Lord is to build a house for someone who doesn't have one."

Amen!

Look Dad, The Perfect Church. Pull the car over!!

I need to get a pipe!

Alright, I take off a day or so from blogging, and cyber-space zaps past me. My friend Tod Bolsinger has a wonderful series of posts on Perfect Church here and here. In particular, take a few moments and read the comments. Wonderful stuff. Really great - a collection of people who really care and are passionate about the church. A conversation about what the church could actually be, as opposed to whining (which I do lots) about what it is not. Could this be another Bolsinger book in the making? I sure hope so!

Here are my thoughts on the Perfect Church. First off, please, please, watch this movie as a partial but important illustration to my response. Brother Sun, Sister Moon, released in 1972, is the story of the life of St. Francis of Assisi. This movie, more than any other for me illustrates many of my ideals of the church, more so in the character of Francis and his friends, but also with small peeks at what a church should be. The movie is over the top in some ways, but wonderfully simple in its presentation of changed lives for Christ. Also, Donovan fans will love it.

Second, here are my "Top Ten" of Perfect Church Requirements:

10. Never having to hear, "We've never done it that way before!"
9. Missions, missions; urban, suburban, national and international.
8. A sense of constant call to those who do not know Christ, and a will for all to be completely welcoming
7. Willingness to experiment, and fail if necessary, with new ways to reach out - to welcome the questioning and lost
6. Sermons that connect the ancient mystery of the Gospel to the challenges of living in the modern world
5. A congregation that is intentional about welcoming anyone, regards of race, clothing, income, etc.
4. Joy, laughter, and endless enthusiasm for building community. Ability to be flexible and "messy" Christian folk
3. Flexibility in worship, and a congregation that works toward excellence and creativity in worship.
2. The Gospel proclaimed faithfully by a staff that reflects the mercy and love of Jesus.
1. Lives transformed, consistently, remarkably by the grace of Christ.

Our Friend Mr. Bee

Terry Schiavo

This is simply not right. I know. Our dearest friends have a family member who is living in sub-acute care, and slowly declining from Huntingtons Disease. His name is Bee, (known affectionately as Mr. Bee, to those who love him). He is about my age. He is my friend, and each time we visit him, he always tells me that he loves me; he like to repeat that. A lot.

Bee has an MBA, was once married, and has just about the sweetest heart of any man I know. He is more cognitive than Terry Shiavo, but cannot care for himself anymore, and requires round-the-clock medical assistance. The doctors and nurses who work with him are wonderful.

Bee cannot eat normally like the rest of us. One of the effects of Huntington's is a constriction of the esophagus to the point that choking on food is common. And so, Bee has a feeding tube. If his feeding tube were removed, he would slowly die, and it would not be pleasant. It would be, in my mind, unspeakably cruel. Bee's extended family understands that although his quality of life is not that of ours, he is still persistently and dearly loved by God, and is one of His children. It is not for us to decide that Bee has become too much of a burden and should be allowed to slowly die. We will stand with Bee's family, as long as God has need of him here with us on earth. Life is not neat; yet it is in the messiness that we find Christ.

It seems that Terry Shiavo's ex-husband has been the primary moving force in disconnecting Terry's feeding tube. Might we all agree to pray for this man, that God might change his heart, and change it soon.

My Wife - Gotta Love Her

Building a bit of the Kingdom

For the past 10 years or so, my wife has always wanted to celebrate her 40th birthday by building a home for someone less fortunate. Well, 40 came and went, and what with the busy-ness of two daughters in school, multiple sports, church, music lessons, etc, that trip to build the house slipped by.

However, about two months ago, God provided my Nancy with the chance to go to Tijuana to build a home. She is there right now, and I am home with the girls. The team hopes to complete the 14' by 14' home in three days (with the foundation being poured before they arrived), with the help of 25 volunteers from Southern California. Simply stated, this is a very good thing, and it is my hope and prayer that this weekend will be filled with love, laughter, lots of hammering, a roof that doesn't leak, and doors and windows that will emit the sounds of a happy family for many years to come. Solo Deo Gloria.

I was in a pastor friend's office today, and spotted this quote, framed on the wall:

"Lord its your Church.

I am going to bed."

Prayer attributed to Pope John XXIII

Awwww...so touching

Loneliness in a Crowd?

So very alone...

Interesting. My little bits recently on Homeless Churchie, Perfect Church, and Church Shopping have started the gears turning inside Tod Bolsinger's head. This is great; and perhaps will engender more conversation about what the church does well, and not so well. We might also touch on what the church "blows chunks" at, if you will, to coin a phrase from the eminent pastor KC Wahe.

I have seen quite a bit of church "chuck blowage" in my last 25 years, but have also experienced so many good things, much blessing, and have met the finest, most sincere, honest and wonderful people I know - all in church. A veritable rainbow, if you will.

And now on to today's topic, illustrated above - loneliness. My wife and I have been experiencing quite a bit of this as of late, as we have left the comfortable confines of our church home, after 17 years of involvement. We have, so far, been to two different churches in the past eight months or so, and have visited a third church together as well. As I look back, the common thread is one of a haunting sense of loneliness associated with our church visits. The worship is fine, the sermons are good, even great on some occasions. But the interaction, the "fellowship" if you will, is sadly lacking. If I never showed up again, no one would know, or care.

But our family is doing alright - don't worry about us. We will survive. What I wonder about is this:

What about the experiences of those attending church with real needs? Those not accustomed to the folly of "church" folk. What of those with needs that nearly ooze out of their pores. Relational pain, the loss of someone close to a horrid disease or accident, those who have suffered abuse, or addiction, or great suffering. Others who are profoundly confused, or lost, or just plain mad at God? If my wife and I leave many Sundays feeling strangely lonely, what of these others? What do they think of church? Did someone greet them, ask them their name? Will they come back? Will anyone care?

Or will that deep sense of quiet, relentless, haunting loneliness become, in the words of song writer Bob Bennett, their Shadow Companion? And is the church powerless to combat it? Is our work ever done, as long as one of these still sits quietly in the back, come Sunday morning?

Crucial News Item!

And you think this blog does not offer important news items?
Prepare to have your paradigm shifted.

A Company of Soldiers

A Company of Soldiers

Tonight I had the opportunity to watch the PBS Series Frontline, which presented "A Company of Soldiers", involving a detailed look at a unit in the Army's 8th Cavalry in South Baghdad. This piece was filmed during November 2004, a very rough month indeed. I needed to watch this, as do all of here at home, sleeping well and enjoying our lives. This takes place because men like these are dealing with unspeakable risk and threats each day in Iraq.

Imagine driving to the market or work wondering if every other car was loaded with explosives. Explosives designed to blow you up. Or try out the concept of hidden snipers along the route, targeting your car with not only small arms fire, but rocket propelled grenades. This is only part of what these men face. I was struck by their honor, their devotion, their brotherhood, and sense of duty to both their country and the people of Iraq.

We Americans owe a debt of gratitude beyond words to those who serve our country.

Slow Down, You Move Too Fast....

Simon and Garfunkle had it right. Our lives race by at a pace that is stunning, breathtaking, ridiculous. Tod Bolsinger has a post on this topic that uses his own folly as a good example of what is wrong with many of us, myself included near the top of the list. I have found myself bugged recently because my personal life is infringing on time I could be spending at the office....oh PLU-EASE, Steve!

In anticipation of Good Friday and Easter, we must recall that Christ has done something amazing, remarkable, mysterious - an act of love from the heart of God. Perhaps Lent is a time of year we need to remember this, and to ...........slow................down.

Ok, so tomorrow I will spend more time just talking to my wife and children. I will call an old friend and ask how he is really doing. I will put in a call to my aging parents. I will slow down to thank God for what song writer Bob Bennett calls the Small Graces. Amen, and thanks for the reminder, brother Tod.

This Dude So Totally Rocks!

Pastor KC

About fifty jillion years ago, I used to spend time with a group of college aged fellows from my old church. One of these guys had an amazing life story, coming from a dysfunctional family, he attended college, Princeton Seminary, and is now an Associate Pastor in Northern California. He is truly a remarkable reflection of God's grace and mercy, and the transforming power of Christ. I am so proud of my friend, KC.

And now, my old friend, KC Wahe, has a blog. Just about nothing else in the Universe, besides In N' Out burgers, a great 8-iron shot into the green from a tough lie, and my wife (not in that order, honey!) is as cool as this concept. Read this Blog daily, memorize it, and make it a part of your daily bloggage activity. Low in fat, high in protein, use as directed.

Strangers - Part III

The King had a dream....

Recently I heard a series of messages given by Dr. Mark Labberton of First Presbyterian Church of Berkeley. All credit here goes to Dr. Labberton. Below are my simple attempts to process the thoughts of this kind pastor. The series of talks was entitled, Strangers in a Strange Land. The Scripture is from Daniel Chapter 2.

The primary question many of us spend lots of time asking in our lives is:

"Is God able to handle this situation"

Indeed. Is He? Can He? Will He?

In every human heart, there is a longing for a genuine spiritual encounter. Our culture is replete with seeking people; those who want something real, something substantial, not a just a "show" of Christian sounding platitudes. However, if people are longing to experience God, and are seeking Him, how will they know when He has, in fact, "shown up" - made His Prescence real to them?

This was the dilemma of King Nebuchadnezzar. He was seeking for a real,authentic, and trustworthy voice from God. He gave Daniel a real acid test, involving the threat of real violence if he did not get what he wanted. Are we alert and listening to those around us who, more subtly express the same kind of need for God, and that He could actually be known. How well do we listen to those around us, and how often do we tend to "cubby hole" people into categories?

In the midst of the rage of the King, Daniel responded with discretion. Daniel and his friends had practiced their indentity. They were grounded people, they knew to whom they belonged. Are we prepared to trust God for a vision that exceeds our normal grasp of things around us? Daniel and his friends believe that they serve a God who influences all those around them, those who claim to know him, and those who do not. This attitude and the prayer of Daniel clearly distills the character of God who is far larger than our ideas of him.

More coming....

Hope for Healing

Julie and her family

Those faithful who have stopped by this blog in the past, have heard about my friend Julie, who continues to battle cancer. It has been almost a year now since her second cancer event. This time it is very serious, sometimes ugly, and very hard on this dear young family. We spent time with Julie today, praying and singing.

This next week, Julie will be starting radiation for cancer on her spine. She may also be facing the decision to end chemotherapy, as its effects on her physical well being are presently worse than the minor healing effect it appears to be having on her cancer.

Julie would want you to know the following things: God is full of mercy, and He has the power to heal her at any time, in His perfect timing; this cancer is very painful; she is so thankful for those who have prayed for her, supported her family, and loved her during this journey; she is thankful beyond measure for her husband and children; she wants to live, and continue being a wife and mother.

Pray for Julie.